Cheers to my first “love” category post. For those who may not know, I am in a long distance relationship. How far away? A little under 900 miles. He goes to a school down in Virginia, and well… I’m up here in Wisconsin. Pretty far, huh? You’re probably wondering how I even got myself into something like this. We went to high school together (coming up on 4 years in a few months!) and I suppose we both felt that being together was worth the distance. We’ve been doing this “distance” thing for about 2 years now.
Anyway, this post isn’t all about me. I wanted to offer up 5 important things to know that I’ve learned in my experience of long distance. For all those soon-to-be-distant high school sweethearts, recent graduates moving for work, Tinder couples, or whatever has you located in separate places, this is for you.
- You can still have fun and be a perfectly functional person! Geez.
- This really gets me sometimes. When you’re about to be in a long distance relationship, it may often feel like everyone has a negative opinion on it. “Are you sure you want to do that?” …. “It’ll hold you back.” …. “Distance is too hard.” …. “You can’t have any fun in a long distance relationship.” MAH GAWD. Don’t listen to any of that! Contrary to popular belief, being in a long distance relationship doesn’t mean you’re doomed to be some antisocial weirdo that has no love life. You can absolutely do distance, have a healthy relationship, and still slay at life every day. Who cares what other people think? Stay true to yourself and surround yourself with supportive friends. It’s your life- you do you.
- Taking time apart isn’t necessarily a bad thing.
- When my boyfriend and I started college, we actually broke up after the first two weeks. Why are we still together? Well, despite how tough breakups are, that time apart gave us the space to really figure out what we want. It gave us both the ability to focus on ourselves in the midst of such a new chapter of our lives. Looking back, this wasn’t the greatest time of my life, but I’m thankful it happened because it gave me the time to really focus on myself and what I want. To put it bluntly, if you’re meant to be, you’re meant to be. Things will work out and everything happens for a reason.
- It’s important to find ways to spend time together.
- Since you’re away from each other, it’s so important to still make time for your S.O. like you would in person. Doing this helps so much in normalizing your relationship- you need to stay connected as best as you can! Scheduling phone calls, having meals together over FaceTime, or watching a movie together are just a few ideas. Send things to each other, too! Who doesn’t love getting things in the mail from someone you care about? Care packages, letters, and cards are a great way to make your partner’s day and serve as a reminder that you are thinking of them.
- It’s. Not. Easy.
- Alright, I know this fourth point probably has you saying “duh” on your side of the computer screen… but hear me out. Before heading to college, I vastly underestimated how difficult doing long distance would actually be. To go from seeing your partner on a daily basis to their sudden absence is really hard. It’s STILL really hard to go back to my regular life after a visit or any extended period of time with my S.O. But, rest assured, it gets better with time and practice. However, know that it’s OKAY for it not to be easy. When you think about it, would it be easy to be distant if you really care for that person? Never.
- …But it’s worth it!
- If you love the person you are doing distance with, the times you get to see each other truly feel like the best days ever (seriously). Being distant really teaches you to cherish your time with that person and to not take it for granted. Yeah, the distance part is bound to feel hard at times, but seeing that person after however long you were apart is beyond worth it. Trust me.